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Ashley DelBello Coaching

Let’s Talk About Receiving

Let’s talk about receiving. You may be thinking, but what does that have anything to do with creating a thriving life + career?

Well, I’m here to tell you that Receiving is everything. Your ability to receive is everything. It is directly correlated to the success that you will or won’t have in your life. 

Because if you can’t receive – help, support, resources, money, thank you’s, feedback, compliments, someone paying for your coffee, etc. – it’s going to be a long, uphill battle to Thriving.

Sure, you’ll have some success, but it’s the difference between living a mediocre life and a  fu*cking fantastic one.

So what do you say? Let’s start receiving a little more.

It’s part practical, part energetic (or woo if you’d prefer, but quantum physics is a science-backed thing, y’all! So, I’m all about the woo these days).

So – the practical part – if you literally can’t accept support – whether that’s someone (aka your partner, your family, some other trusted person in your network) taking your daughter for a few hours so you can do whatever the FU*K you want to do, then it’s going to be hard to Thrive. You can’t do everything all of the time. You can’t be everything to everyone. It doesn’t work like that.

Yes, we as humans are designed to flourish and thrive, but not if you are too proud, too I gotta do this myself, too believing that you don’t deserve it, too feeling guilty, etc., to accept help doing it.

We are designed to flourish and thrive in connection with other living beings. That story we are sold about having to do everything by ourselves. Or that we have to earn everything we receive. Not fu*king true. Not even one ounce of it. It’s a made-up story…basically to keep us from thriving. To keep us in the status quo.

So start practicing receiving!

Now the energetic part, when you aren’t CLEANLY accepting the compliments, aren’t accepting the free coffee, the additional time you just got back in your day, etc. you are basically pushing everything else (money, love, time, connection, joy, support, etc.) away.

You are telling the universal energetic field (again, quantum physics guys – we are energy and all energy is connected, so we are all connected by this energetic field) that you don’t want anything more. You don’t have the capacity for anything more. You’re also telling it you don’t think you’re worthy enough to receive it. And look, the universal energetic field doesn’t care one way or the other. It just listens to what you’re putting out there and when you aren’t cleanly and genuinely able to receive then, it’s like OK, she/he/they doesn’t want this.

You’re not cleanly creating space for you to receive more of whatever it is you want.

So here are some facts about receiving:

  • Your ability to receive is directly related to how thriving + successful your life + career will be.
  • Receiving is everything.
  • Receiving is an act of love.
  • Your capacity to receive is linked to your boundaries. More on boundaries, receiving and people-pleasing in a future post!
  • You can start small.

Starting small looks like saying thank you and really meaning it, really acknowledging when someone holds the door open for you.

Starting small looks like saying “thank you” full stop when someone compliments you, your work, whatever. Receiving the compliment without discounting it or throwing in a “but I couldn’t have done it without…”. Resist the temptation to diminish it. Resist the urge to immediately compliment them back. Sit in the feeling of the compliment – even if it is just for a moment.

Starting small looks like finding a way to accept (and ask for!) support and help from others. If someone offers to help you – watch your kids for an hour, bring you dinner, etc. – practice saying yes. Without the guilt or shame (because that’s all really just your ego talking) as best as you can.

Starting small also looks like intentionally noticing what you receive each day – a smile or a hello from a stranger, a compliment from a colleague. Just notice when you receive. Try to receive without giving back.

And remember you are worthy of receiving all that you need and desire. Practicing receiving may bring up some feelings of whether you deserve all that you are receiving. So just notice that, be kind to yourself and know that you are worthy of having it all.

xoxo Ashley

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